Work, life and "obligation" balance - Stephanie Kennar

 

It is that time of year when many of us are thinking about how we want our life to look like for the coming year. Resolutions were made this last month (or re-visited yet again from last year in my case.)

Many of these centre around our health: walk more, lose weight, take meditation classes, eat less chocolate, cut down on coffee, drink more water and sleep more.

Some of these resolutions are concerning our relationships: a date with husband once a week, more bedtime stories with the children, bike ride with a friend And there are also our career, finance and business aspirations ranging from increasing the earnings to outsourcing to giving the credit cards a break.

And the list goes on. Yes, I do want to do more. I want to manage more. I want to achieve some wins in all aspects of my life, without creating more stress. This has probably been a wish for many working Women - It's what's called "Work, Life Balance"

 

The "Work" part, is a 'have to do' in most cases. Sometimes our need to do it well sees us tipping the balance and squeezing the "down time" into "no time." The "Life" part seems to suggest we fit in a massage, a walk in the park, coffee with a friend and keep a contrast between the pressures of everyday.

I'd like to know where the large amount of uninvited and unscheduled activities fit in to this "Work, Life Balance" schedule. It's not to say I don't like surprises and I know that many things happen for a reason, but my carefully managed time goes out of whack when this happens.

Take this month as an example:

Just the other week, a Friday spent working from home was a day of churning through the unfinished admin jobs from the week. At 5pm, I decided to finish-up, go for a walk with the dog and buy the necessary red wine for a dinner home with my husband. Sounds like a good plan for "Work, Life Balance."

We live on a busy street surrounded by cafes, restaurants and next door being a well known pub. The dog and I walked past the pub back home, both relieved to be getting out of the 32 heat. Two men in their 30s are propping up a woman of a similar age on the side walk. She seems oblivious to anything. I keep walking; it's not that unusual to see people overindulged in alcohol or drugs or both in the area. I go inside. Curiosity gets the better of me and I observe from my window upstairs. The men are trying to get her on to the bench on the pavement outside my house. My first thoughts were annoyance. Losers, no-hopers and weak-willed were all words I branded these people who had obviously had a big day doing nothing.

I decide to get involved not sure if I am interrupting a good time, setting myself up to be mugged or helping out someone that needs medical attention. I go back outside. The woman is not conscious and the men are not too happy to see me. I call the ambulance that arrives with the police. The ambulance officers stabilize her and take her off to the hospital. They are not sure if it is a voluntary day of bingeing or a result of drink spiking. By the time I give my statement to police, it is an hour later and I feel distracted.

Then there is Gerry who lives a few doors down. He rides the local area on a uni-cycle playing the ukulele with a happy grin on his face. He has a lot of time on his hands. I'm not sure about his story or his emotional health. We decide to give him some handyman jobs to do around the house.

And Mr. O'Shea. He's a local too and lives in the commission flats. He is 93 years old and tells me he didn't expect to live this long and has run out of savings and super. He lives in the commission flats. He walks everywhere with his walking frame and likes to stop and have long chat when you see him.

Back to last year's resolutions. One of them was to schedule time on local community projects and charities. That would have been a great way to contribute some time or money to those less fortunate.

Well, I have realized there is no need to schedule. The opportunities arrive anyway and it's a matter of sometimes letting them interrupt the "me" time or at a time when it's not convenient.